so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I just blew my weed a kiss
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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