she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
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