used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
My feet surprised me
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
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