My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
