Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize