Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
