Pants 0. Shit 1.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
just found out that she named her cat after me.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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