Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
