the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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