it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
This baby is an asshole
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Randomize
