sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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