Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, jail baloney is awful.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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