i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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