ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
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