Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
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