I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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