Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize