I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
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