how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize
