This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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