No awkward lesbian experiences without me
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
