her vagine was all disorganized.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
