at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Randomize
