Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
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