Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Randomize
