i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
