rhymes with "ouble enetration"
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
