ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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