2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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