haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
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