She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Sext me about skeletons
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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