but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Couch. On fire.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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