Texts From Last Night

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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time

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  (505): Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time http://tfl.nu/wts0
  Replies (9) Good night (691) Bad night (2685) Order T-Shirt
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm

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  (615): i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm http://tfl.nu/dyx8
  Replies (28) Good night (4919) Bad night (610) Order T-Shirt
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.

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  (978): watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night. http://tfl.nu/ve5u
  Replies (20) Good night (1139) Bad night (4116) Order T-Shirt
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it

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  (651): This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it http://tfl.nu/dpvg
  Replies (19) Good night (3753) Bad night (1046) Order T-Shirt
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.

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  (314): Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced. http://tfl.nu/yqud
  Replies (14) Good night (6130) Bad night (703) Order T-Shirt
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.

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  (570): since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there. http://tfl.nu/6g57
  Replies (4) Good night (2635) Bad night (700) Order T-Shirt
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing

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  (810): There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing http://tfl.nu/i1k5
  Replies (7) Good night (2608) Bad night (949) Order T-Shirt
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other

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  (608): I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other http://tfl.nu/go45
  Replies (15) Good night (3265) Bad night (884) Order T-Shirt
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  (228): View more from Mississippi

  He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"

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  (228): He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good" http://tfl.nu/hwu1
  Replies (33) Good night (6576) Bad night (975) Order T-Shirt
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Stop drinking before 5

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Easier said than done

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  (651): Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies (612): Stop drinking before 5 (651): Easier said than done http://tfl.nu/j7cm
  Replies (3) Good night (1359) Bad night (636)
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  (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.

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  (709): I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards. http://tfl.nu/5dgw
  Replies (6) Good night (1286) Bad night (396) Order T-Shirt
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  (229): View more from Georgia

  Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..

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  (229): Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it .. http://tfl.nu/xli3
  Replies (11) Good night (2701) Bad night (567)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.

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  (513): While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from. http://tfl.nu/e26m
  Replies (10) Good night (754) Bad night (883) Order T-Shirt
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.

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  (630): I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive. http://tfl.nu/thwy
  Replies (13) Good night (723) Bad night (556) Order T-Shirt
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List

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  (405): Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List http://tfl.nu/9eia
  Replies (1) Good night (306) Bad night (51) Order T-Shirt

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