she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Randomize
