he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize