absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Randomize
