38 yer olds are good kisserssss
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
