i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
