Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
