have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
My Sexting was not on an AP level
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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