help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
