I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Randomize
