My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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