god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize