Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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