Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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