therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
