she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Randomize
