i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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