I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
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